A Letter to KStew*

November 17, 2009 § Leave a comment

Dear KStew,

I have a few things to say to you and a few things to ask. We’ll start with the premiere last night. I know according to my last post about you I predicted you’d wear some funky architectural short dress when I shopped for you at Forever21. But really, I’ll be honest, deep down I knew you’d wear something long and totally different we’ve never seen you in. And I do appreciate the effort. It was the most important premiere you’d be attending and you went all out, but I just wasn’t feeling the cotillion dress. I agree with Lainey Gossip. Your hair rocked, makeup was awesome as usual and your Oscar de la Renta dress was pretty, but I just don’t think it did much for you. It looked a bit frumpy really. And wtf was Ashley Greene thinking trying to upstage you in that god-awful Miss USA getup. That girl needs a new stylist and an ego-check. But that’s beside the point. Even in your less than bad-ass outfit, you still looked better than that mess. Next time though, let’s show a little leg and a little more edge.

And another thing, I would like to know how you get such flawless alabaster skin. Do you hire someone to powder you down? Or is it because you have 19 year old skin? What is your secret? Because every time I try to go with the pale look, I just end up looking like I’ve caught the flu. And when you rock the white legs, it looks chic, but when I rock my mine, I blind people. Nonetheless, I do appreciate you representin’ us pale girls. WooWoo! It’s nice to see that pale is making a comeback. And it also makes me happy that Robward seems to dig pale brunettes. It gives me hope (for Thursday).

And lastly, I saw you on Conan last night. It looked as though you did his show right before the premiere b/c your hair was the same. You did a good job. Usually your flustered blubbering and incomplete sentences annoy the sh*t out of me, but you actually made sense last night and even cracked a few jokes! I think you’re getting the hang of this limelight thing. Nice job!

Now I’m going to go powder myself down and get ready for Thursday. Look out Robsten, here we come.


*I apologize for the plethora of KStew posts. It’s just that it’s New Moon week and my inner Twi-Hard has taken over. Normal me will be back next week, er, or the next.




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